commitment

 i have a lot of hobbies. i sing, play instruments, post those on Instagram, crochet, post blogs, read. so sometimes I've noticed that i lose the motivation in the middle of the process. its just so much commitment and I've never been good with commitment. which explains the number of friends i have. so i also found it difficult to continue writing blogs and posting. but to be honest i should stop giving things up. i cant count the number of unfinished crochet projects i have lying in my bag. but every time i start a new project. for once ,i need to start something and stick to it till its over. I was really stressed the past few days because my exams didn't go well and i was scared that i wouldn't get a college, but yesterday i got acceptance letter from a reputed college. my parents are happy with it and I'm stress free. but I'm still scared. because what do you mean my college will start in august. WHAT DO YOU MEAN IM LITERALLY JUST 15. my mom reminded me of how i wanted to become really muscular and bought dumbbells back in 1st year. lmao i gave up in like one month. also i noticed that I'm kinda fat and want to lose all that extra fat on my stomach which makes me look like I'm expecting all the time. ill work on that and get a summer bod so that i can wear cute dresses and tops without feeling insecure. a lot more to write and a mind full of thoughts. but ill go for a walk now and listen to some calming music. i think i should raw dog the walk though ..just think about God and life and future. I messed up stuff with God again. just shoot me atp. not really because id end up in hell. i talked to bestiee todayyy yayyyyyyy i missed herrrrrrr. it was fun, played some games. i wish she lived near me. life would've been so much better if i could just hug her, i still love my life and I'm greatful for everything but i wish she lived nearby.