stressed is an understatement

 I AM SO CONFUSED. I genuinely am so confused about my life. I wanted to be an air-hostess, that didn't work out. I wanted to go abroad to study BTech, that also didn't work out. I was close to going to Australia for bsw and job but that is also not working out. I am so confused and stressed. God has been constantly reassuring me to trust him and hope on him and all. I do trust him. but I'm so anxious. I have no idea what path to take and I've asked God to make his way clear. So I'm currently vomiting from anxiety and trying my best to trust in him. I am not at all preparing for Bitsat. No chance for me to get a seat. I can't study anymore. I NEED a break. I need it very badly. Study won't enter my mind and i don't have any motivation to keep going. I DESPERATELY NEED TO GET AWAY AND DISSOCIATE ON THE BEACH. I NEED BEACH. PLEASE. SOMEONE TAKE ME AWAY. I'm done trying to study for entrances. I'm not made for ts and I don't think I can do it. I want to fast-forward time to 10 years later or till the day I give birth. BABIES. I WANT BABIES SO BAD. I WANT ONE. I saw a baby today in church and he was SOOOOOOO CUTEEEEE i just wanted to bite his cheeks. I recently rewatched h20 Just add water and i love it even more now. I wanna be a mermaid so bad. I will leave everything and everyone and live in the ocean forever. I will be so so happy just wooshing and swimming for the rest of my life. I WAS BORN TO LIVE NEAR THE OCEAN. NEAR THE BEACH. someone take me away. 

this is my new wallpaper